Inflation: Day 24 update
Those of you who have been following my little game may recall that last time I posted, I was trying to draw out the teasing leading up to my daily edge, to test the theory that by increasing the period of stimulation, I'd be better able to say no to an orgasm when the moment of decision arrived. I'm pleased to report that my theory seems to be well supported!
On Day 17, I spent a bit over an hour and a half with a low-powered vibrator nestled up against my clit, giving me a short pulse about once a second. It was enough to keep me turned on an wet, but not enough to get me anywhere close to an edge. After that, I spent another 30 minutes slowly driving myself up to the edge with my fingers. Once I finally got there, I held it for a few seconds and then was able to choose to deny my orgasm, with a wonderful glowing feeling from the over-two-hours-worth of teasing I had just had.
On Day 18, I decided to try another long tease. The game thus far had seemed to fall into a pattern: edging once a day on weekdays, paying the punishment edges for at least one orgasm on the weekends. So, I though, maybe if I could just get through one more day, through the weekend, and say no one more time, perhaps I'll be able to last all the way until the next weekend. So once again, I tucked that low-powered vib against my clit and let it pulse away while I squirmed and clenched and tried to keep from thrusting my hips into it too often. It felt like there was both more incentive and more cost to saying no to my orgasm, since I knew with the week I had coming up at work, there'd be little chance at another orgasm until the next weekend.
Since prolonged teasing had seemed to help satiate me so far, I decided to draw it out even further on Day 18. I kept the vibe in place for over 2 hours. At the end of that, I teased myself mentally for about 30 minutes, looking back through old posts on this site, reading other people's accounts/fantasies of teasing and denial, imagining myself in their situations, but without any physical stimulation on my end. After that, I finally teased myself slowly up to an edge, rubbing myself to a slow, steady metronome pace of 40 bpm. After 3 hours of stimulation to finally reach my edge, I once again had that lovely glowing feeling and was able to say no to my orgasm.
Days 19-23 were, in a way, more of a challenge. I didn't have time to work up to my edges each day, so when decision time came, I wanted more. However, I also knew I didn't have time to pay all the punishment edges that an orgasm would require without seriously cutting into my sleep. I said no each day, but was left with more of an ache than a glow; and while that ache feels sexy/terrible/delicious in its own right, it's harder to choose than the glow that comes with denial after a long tease.
It's Day 24 now, I haven't cum since Day 11, and I'm already over 2 hours into another drawn out tease. I spent an hour doing things around the house with that low-powered vib nestled against my clit. Then I took it off for a while and read some of the entries on tantalism from the last week. Then I put it back on for half an hour while I made and ate lunch. I took it off again while I wrote up this blog post, since that's stimulation enough on its own to keep me aroused. I'm going to try for at least another hour of light teasing before I work up to my edge. Right now, I'm optimistic that I'll be able to choose that glow over an orgasm. Though, part of me worries about a little voice in the back of my head suggesting that the glow from those 40 punishment edges (the current price of an orgasm), especially if they're spread out over 2 or 3 days, might be even better . . .
[later that day]Update: I was, indeed, able to say no once again on Day 24, after teasing myself off and on for over 5 hours. The prolonged teasing really seems to help on days when I would most be tempted to otherwise choose an orgasm. I won't have as much teasing time tomorrow, so we'll see if I finally give in or if I can say no again.
It occurs to me that the prolonged teasing is a particularly insidious form of self-denial. Yes, it seems to make it easier for me to say no to an orgasm. But all those hours I spend teasing myself would give me more than enough time to do all the punishment edges needed to pay for an orgasm. I really am just doing it to myself . . .