Virtual Chastity
Well, I'm back on the meds (for those who don't know, I was given a break from some of the meds that were torturing me). I am not on the worst one yet, nevertheless, I'm enduring anorgasmia and hyperactive libido daily. With the offending drug currently I can opt for a break, but then I must endure pain. I tried that for the first time yesterday, and it's not worth it. I had many, many orgasms. There was no satisfaction. I was hard again within a minute the first time, and mere seconds each subsequent time, the arousal seemingly worse with each cum. By the time enough of the drug was out of my system to try and get real satisfaction I was in too much pain to try again. So, it's back to a life of constant, insatiatable desire and no orgasms for me. I may have to go back on the other med and eventually increase the dose, meaning my desire will get exponentially worse and invade my sleep. I won't know until January.
To make it more bearable, my wife is elated to take full control of her love slave again and enjoy the benifets of the "virtual chastity belt". I doesn't really make it more bearable at all, but certainly makes it more fun. Since I have to endure it regardless it might as well be part of our play. I was told this morning to prepare myself for what is about to come (probably her hehe). I will be keeping count of her orgasms though. As those of you who read my blogs may know, with herculean efforts I can be made to have an orgasm, though not nearly as satifying as without the meds. There have been times that I have made the efforts, satisfied her until I couldn't hardly thrust anymore and when it was her turn to become the "driver" she simply said "I don't think I'm gonna let you cum today." and there was nothing I could do about it. I was truly totally helpless, and peering over the edge without the energy to push myself any further. For every time she does this to me, I'm going to have to return the favor when I get control :) It's only fair hehe (and she can't cum without either me, or specific toys that I tend to hide).
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Comments
Intense and difficult
Your situation sounds rather intense and difficult. Are the side effects you are experiencing considered normal for the drugs you're taking or are you having an unusual reaction?
I'm familiar with the sensation of feeling unsatisfied immediately after having an orgasm and it can certainly be frustrating at times. It's fun in the short term, but the idea of being physically unable to resolve that frustration under any circumstances sounds rather upsetting. It's great that you are able to make the best of the situation by taking advantage of your condition to provide pleasure for your wife. That does sound like rather a lot of fun for her. I do hope, though, that things eventually become at least reasonably bearable for you.
Intensity squared, endurance required
It is exceptionally intense, especailly right now. I am experiencing slightly abnoral side effects. These effects are sometimes considered normal when withrawing from these meds as they often dampen libido in others. However it is not totally off the wall for someone with a neurological history (I had a head injury in 2001 with excessive seizures). I had never experienced the sensation of lack of satisfaction immediately afterwards, just the previous anorgasmia. As far as becoming better, there is hope in that I have a doctor who is making progress on certain indicators of my own ability to heal, meaning eventually I can come off the meds. Its just too soon right now.
On another note, I am still considered the submissive in our relationship, despite that we both switch at times. I have been teased mercilessly since yesterday afternoon and I am climbing the walls with need. She had me panting again with need when I went to sleep and my dreams were all very vividly sexual. She admitted she was proud of herself this morning when I was *still* panting at her light caresses. She is preparing me for the weekend. I have no idea exactly what she is planning, but an educated guess is that I'll be begging and helpless. I have passed the point of feeling aggressive enough to take control and feel like I would do absolutely anything for the remote chance of an orgasm.
We have a date planned tonight (keep dating after the vows, kids, and pets. It means you still have time for each other). The date is a movie and subsequent dinner. I admit aprehension about being in a dark room for several hours with her hands easily able to reach my pockets. I wonder how much of the movie I'll get to see.