female denial, solo female

While teasing is still a strong interest, we've spent the past few months mainly experimenting with new techiques (the better to torture each other when we tease, I say). Some of it has involved playing in public (a real turn-on for me), and various kinds of obedience (love this, as it's all psychological), but mostly it's been experimenting with various sensations--in the shower with water streaming over my face, on the carpet with wool scratching my back, in the heat, in the cold, wearing a dress, wearing pants, sitting up, lying down, and my favorite, playing with household objects. I've been on the receiving end of a hairbrush handle, a kaleidoscope, a Sharpie marker, and ice. I definitely recommend ice.

I discovered the magic of ice cubes in college, where every dorm room was equipped with a mini fridge/freezer that containued a mini ice tray. It produced small and slightly rounded ice cubes. I also had a room to myself, at the end of a hall and far away from anyone else, which meant I was free to walk around naked, watch porn at an audible volume, and try almost anything that came into my mind, without fear of interruption...

This is my first blog here so please excuse anything i do that is annoying. I'm a bisexual submissive female. I am new to the idea os solo teasing and denial and was hoping to find some ideas and advice here... Are there sites i am missing programs i have not found.. help! thanks

julie

I've mentioned before that I have a hard time becoming aroused and it's one of the reasons I love being denied and want to stay denied for very long periods of time. I love this feeling and it's so hard to get myself back to this point sometimes.

I've occasionally peeked around at the hypnotism site www.warpmymind.com. Most of the files is of no interest to me (and some are beyond ridiculous but I shouldn't knock other people's fetishes I suppose) but I've tried a few files to not much effect. Probably because I've no real interest in the outcome. I'm also wary of the whole subject - not that I have anything against it, I just don't particularly like the idea of not having complete control over my actions. I don't want some imbedded suggestion propelling me to do things. I know they say it can't make you do something you would wholly and morally object to but it still freaks me out a little.

A short time ago my husband and I separated after a brief and unhappy marriage that only lasted a few months. During sex he exerted extreme pressure (physical and mental) on me to gratify his every sexual fantasy; some of which I found very distasteful. No consideration was given to fulfilling my sexual needs and the words foreplay and tenderness were not in his vocabulary. Currently I am in the process of getting a divorce and rebuilding my life.

During the early days, following my separation, a girlfriend, whom I have known for several years, was very supportive and affectionate. She helped me greatly during those difficult days. Before long, I found her caresses becoming passionate and quite intimate. My body quickly responded to her sensuous touching, but emotionally and spiritually, I was confused by her open affection. In the weeks that followed, we had lengthy frank discussions about my sexual longings and need for release. She suggested solo masturbation and orgasm denial in the context of a bi-sexual relationship. Finally, with my yearnings continuing to intensify and starting to feel the onset of sexual arousal whenever I was in her presence, I agreed to submit to orgasm denial under her control.

That is me. I cheated. I orgasmed...twice. :D

As soon as I get to the point where I'm trying to talk myself into letting myself come, whether I'm "allowed" to or not, is the time I should be getting up, dressed and out to do something to distract myself.

Didn't do that this morning. ah well. It felt damn good and after the stressful week I've had, I don't feel even the littlest bit guilty. *g*

13 days, though. Nothing to sneeze at. :D

Not much to report here. I think it's now been 10 days since I last had an orgasm. And something like 7 days before I can roll again.

Up until yesterday, I've been teasing myself a good portion of the time. Work has been incredibly difficult to concentrate on because all I want to do is read porn or watch porn or think of porn...you get the idea. ;) Can't exactly do much of that at work, though (well, they can't stop me thinking of it heh).

Some personal family life drama crap happened yesterday though and it's been pretty upsetting for me and I actually made myself a little sick last night. I stayed home from work today. I was thinking I would try to enjoy myself with my day off and get my teasing started again but I can't stop thinking of all this other stuff and then I get upset again and the cycle returns. I thought maybe if I read the boards and posted, I'd get my mind on to more enjoyable things. At the moment, it's kind of working. Maybe after I run my errand to the store and grab some lunch, I'll be feeling more like my normal self.

Hi all. Long time no talk. :)

I was going through some old documents I had saved on my computer awhile back and came across the dice game that someone here posted some time ago (no link handy at the moment - will try to find it here later). I remembered I always wanted to try this on myself. :)

So, on top of 6 days previous of ongoing self-denial (longest in a very long time), I started the dice game yesterday. Here's hoping it doesn't turn out like the 2 "test" trials I did for fun (where I rolled continuously to see how long it would take to get an orgasm) where one said I wouldn't get to come until March 16, 2007 and the other I finally gave up some time around the date of November 2008, with 4 chastity marks still on the board. *g* I have a small amount of self-control (would have to to be able to do self-denial period) but no way do I have that much. hee