Jester's blog

It's now been 5 days since I last touched myself. And honestly... it's been lovely! I've been getting aroused more than I ever have before, including spending most of last night, and it feels wonderful!

It's also been very frustrating at times. My cock screams to be touched, but I've been a good boy, and haven't given in to the temptation. I have however been tormenting myself with sexy thoughts at every opportunity, and I've had a picture of my favorite AbbyWinters girl on my desktop (*drool*) for the last week. (Which itself has spawned many sexy thoughts... Oh, I'd love nothing more than to stick my face between her legs... mmmmmmmm...) I haven't had any raging hardons, but I've been very... tingly. It's exactly the sort of sensation I've been trying to cultivate.

It's now 3 days into my full week of no-touch.

So far it hasn't been very difficult. The need (heh) comes and goes. There's been a few mornings where I've been on the verge of humping the mattress, and talking about denial and looking at porn gets me going, sometimes to the point of me going "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea!"

But overall, I'm holding up pretty well.

Though I'm sure, by Saturday, I'll be glad when I'm able to touch again!

Well, as promised, today begins a week of no-touch. It sounds like a daunting endeavor, but my libido is so low that I spent 3 days this week basically on no-touch, just because I wasn't interested. Hopefully after a week I'll be begging for the slightest touch!

The orgasms this week have been good. The first one after denial was a much-needed release after so long. But the second one... That was a writhing, thrashing, moaning good one! The rest... well, they weren't significantly better for having been in denial... but I think I enjoyed them more for it. I'd almost forgotten how good it fe

I would like to thank all of you that participated. Thank you for voting Yes, and just as importantly, thank you for voting No! Especially thank you to college_experiment for your 'No' vote this week, and for the thought you obviously put into it. I really do appreciate that. And I like how you teased me by introducing it as a 'reward' Because, really, you were right. I did want to get even more desperate.

Sadly, I've shown no sign of getting any more horny, no matter how long I go, and I have the suspicion that going an extra week wouldn't have helped. So it's just as well that I finally got that orgasm. I'm glad it happened this way. Not that it was getting difficult... just that it was starting to get boring.

Today has been a typical day. Wake up early, play with myself, drive myself crazy, fall asleep. Repeat. The desire to cum is as strong as ever, and it would feel really nice right about now...

I still haven't experienced any noticeable horniness during the day. Most of the time my thoughts are occupied by my job. Not that my job requires a lot of brainpower to do. It's just that my brain is overwhelmed by "I WANT TO STRANGLE ALL THESE IDIOTS AROUND ME" thoughts. Not an environment condusive to sexy thoughts.

I have been thinking a lot about my latest game. Fantasizing about what it would be like to play. (Fantasies which might become reality all too soon!)... Imagine, it's your turn. You have to bring yourself to the brink of orgasm and then stop, and if the timer goes off while it's your turn, you don't get to cum! How exciting it must be to be bringing yourself to the edge, all the while not knowing when the bell will ring... edging for your life, almost! And each time around, the stakes get even higher... A day of denial... two days... a week... do you keep pushing forward, bringing yourself to the edge as fast as you can so somebody else can lose... or do you cut your losses and take your time, intentionally losing and resigning yourself to your fate? The faster you go, the faster the stakes rise. But it's the only way to earn your chance to cum!

It has now been 3 full weeks since my last real orgasm. In a sense, this is a record-typing milestone for me. The only time I went this long was when I was taking 60mg of Paxil, and couldn't cum no matter how hard I tried.

I'm still not really very horny. Not during most of the day anyway. When I'm edging I sure want that orgasm, dammit! But the rest of the day I'm not aroused at all.

I'm starting to wonder if a full week of no-touch might not be a bad idea after all. For quite some time now I've suspected that I've been wanking with too much pressure (and not getting laid enough ) that I've become desensitized. Well, leaving it alone for a while might improve that. And before too long I'll be absolutely dying to touch. And then when I start again, only slow, gentle strokes. It will probably drive me up the wall, but it might give me that heightened arousal I've been waiting so long for, as well as increase my sensitivity.

It has now been a full week since my last ruined orgasm. This ties my previous stretch of one week before my first accidental ruin during this period of denial.

I'm sort of venturing into new territory now. I've certainly gone longer than a week, but it was always with the 'help' of medication, or ruined orgasms. The last time I went this long without anything to mitigate the effect was that one 1-week stretch back in my early 20s. I'm looking forward to the next few days (and, depending on Saturday's vote, perhaps longer!), and hoping I experience some new sensations after being denied for so long.

So I just finished Ripple's tease. It was definitely intense! And fun. Although it needed some serious reworking just to make it work at all with my own sexual responses, and one part just had to be scrapped.

I decided to use Ripple's example birthdate rather than my own, since I figured the numbers would have worked out better. It turned out not to matter, as I had to adjust them anyway.

The plan as written was:

• Stroke 22x, pause 7s, repeat 79x
• Stroke 7x, pause 79s, repeat 22x
• Stroke 79x, pause 22s, repeat 7x

Stage 1

So, college_experiment left a tease for me for today: All the edging I want, but no hand contact.

The first question is, what exactly constitutes 'hand contact'? I could have taken it entirely literally and just put on a latex glove, but I don't think that's what she had in mind. And anyways, that would have sucked all the fun out of it. ^_^

So, the first thing I tried was an old standby: The showerhead tease. Unfortunately, despite working beautifully yesterday morning, it did absolutely nothing for me today. It couldn't even get me hard.

So I tried another slightly creative standby.

I see nobody left me a tease for today. Ah well. The invitation is still open to anyone that wants to participate!

In the absence of any teases, I went about edging as usual. It's still intense, still wonderful, and I'm still dying for a cum! There was a moment in my edging where I was so close, and I wanted it so bad, I started moaning. That was a first! I never moan when I'm wanking!

I had a few minutes to spare this afternoon while getting ready for an appointment, so while I showered, I tried the showerhead tease on myself. Boy did I respond fast! Usually the showerhead isn't enough stimulation to get myself aroused, at least not without a lot of time and effort. But in just a few minutes I was at the edge! Another moaning, thrashing edge! The sensations are a bit different, and I'm not used to them, so I had to be careful not to edge too close. But like before, I really wanted that orgasm!